This is infertility: From the Perspective of A Husband

This year, during national infertility awareness week, I asked several people in my life to write a piece about what infertility was like from their perspective.  I decided to transfer all of their thoughts to this little blog for you to enjoy.

So today, I'm starting off with my husbands.  Just go ahead and grab all the kleenexes - I promise you will need them....

My husband and I joke about how his feelings go in a locked box, he throws away the key and then buries the box, to never again see the light of day. We definitely don’t dig them back up and talk about them. Sometimes it’s hard to remember that He is also going through this too. Far too often I think, “I’m the one doing the surgeries, all the blood tests, the injections and drugs - me, not him”. But he has been there, every step of the way.  It’s also rare that we hear from the men. Their stories aren’t really out there. But today - we hear from my husband. He opened the box of emotions from our infertility to share with th…

Dear 4 years ago me ....

Dear me,

Not the me today, but the me 4 1/2 years ago.

I have so much I want to tell you.  So much wisdom I want to share with you to help spare you from the pain you are about to experience.  The next 4 years are going to be the hardest years of your life so far, but somewhere in all that pain, you are going to discover a strength that you never knew you could possess.

The first thing I want you to know.  Do not revolve your life around getting pregnant.  Do not let it consume you.  I know that this will seem almost impossible to do.  Wanting a baby consumes every part of your brain.  But I want you to keep on living.  Live your life to the fullest.  Don't start living your life in a two week cycle, always waiting for ovulation or waiting to be able to take a test.  This is no way to live.

Second.  There is no one thing that is going to be "the thing" that gets you pregnant.  You are going to start off thinking that charting your cycles is going to be it.  Then your do…

Preface: Living with Infertility

I hate first posts.  It seems like such an awkward thing.  You don't know me - I have no idea if anyone is even going to fall across this little space of mine ... But here I am - and here we go.
So Husband and are are entering month 55 of our infertility journey, or in other words, 4 1/2 years.  But 54 months sounds more dramatic doesn't it?
We are 3 surgeries, lots of ultrasounds, blood work, pills & injections in . . . and we are also done.  We are done with the surgeries, done with the treatments, done with the two week wait.  
Except - are you ever done with infertility?  Because we are, in fact, infertile.  We have like a 0.0001 percent change of conceiving.  (Ok - That is a self proclaimed statistic.  After my last surgery, with a world renowned surgeon, he wouldn't even give us a percent of change...) While we are done with treatments and the crazy train of the infertility medical world, I can't say that we are done with infertility.  Th…